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This joke's category: Politics Jokes

After many years of illness, Ronald Reagan was very ill and it appeared that he might not pull through.

Obviously, Nancy and the rest of the family were at his side, as well as the family minister. Knowing that his time might be short, they asked if there was anything he wanted.

"Yes," he replied, "I'd like very much to have President George W. Bush and Vice President Cheney at my side before I go."

They were all amazed at this request and several assumed his memory was failing even worse than they had suspected. Regardless, they went ahead and forwarded his request to the former first family.

Within hours, Mr. Bush and Mr. Cheney arrived at his bedside. For a time, no one said anything. The two of them, one on each side of the bed, and were touched and flattered that Ron would ask them to be with him during his final moments.

They were also puzzled - why would the two of them be called before anyone else to the bedside of former president Reagan? Why not other members of Reagan's family or some of Reagan's many Hollywood friends? He had never given the Bush and Cheney any indication he particularly liked either of them. Finally, President Bush spoke up and asked, "Mr. President, why did you chose the two of us to be at your bedside at this critical moment?"

Mr. Reagan mustered up some strength and said very weakly, "Jesus died between two thieves ... and that's how I want to go, too."
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Top Joke-Telling Tips

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Don't read your joke
The best jokes told are the ones not read from a script. Try to memorize and practice your joke before telling it. If you can tell it without looking at notes, it will sound much more natural. NOTE - No one really says, "he replied" or "she responded." These are purely written joke phrases. Get rid of them!
Get into character
Change your voice or accent for each of the characters in your joke and try making some impromptu sound effects to accentuate the story.
Joke-telling is storytelling. Use details (place names, character descriptions, etc) to make your joke sound more like a real story that you are recounting to a friend. Details draw the audience in and disguise the impending, and hopefully hilarious, twist ending.
Go retro with a Land Line
If you don't have a great cell signal, or a high quality cordless phone, you may be better off going old-school with a landline.
Don't distort
Don't hold the phone too close to your mouth and don't yell. You'd be surprised how sensitive telephone microphones are.
Record it again
If your train of thought derails halfway through the joke, re-record it. Umm's and missed cues should not make it into a Comic Wonder-worthy performance.